Wednesday, October 21st, 2026

Cristián Samper flew to Yerevan and told the UN biodiversity summit, with my money behind him, that "we know how to bring species back from the brink." I did not correct him. For three centuries I have been the brink.

Feeding principle: a Red List is a reorder list.

The $100 million goes into a Species Recovery Alliance with nine founding members and no pooled money, which is how a coven works. Everyone grants alone and coordinates quietly, and Leonardo DiCaprio's people keep a straighter face about it than mine do. There are 31,000 species on that list and I am not one of them, because nobody has ever counted me.

Madagascar's golden-crowned sifaka gets habitat, breeding and release, the full Prime treatment. Australia's night parrot gets nothing from me, on principle. That bird stayed unphotographed for a hundred years, then let a man with a camera find it in a bush. Amateur.

Lauren says children bond with animals before they can read, so we are saving the animals while there is still time to meet them. I nodded for 1.4 seconds, the suit's full range. I meant: a child who has looked a lemur in the eye fears the dark properly, and properly frightened children are the inventory I am restocking.

Day 1 of the Red List: you never eat the last one. You breed it.