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The Energy Vampire Journals

Saturday, October 3rd, 2026

Waxing Moon, Cycle 1, Era 20

TERRITORIAL BULLETIN, FILED FROM THE SUPPLY CLOSET

Comms published a blog today warning cities not to block our data centers or risk "irreparable harm" to national security, written in the exact register of a man explaining why the bear definitely needs the campsite more than you do. I read it three times, searching for the part where we admit the only national security at stake is mine. By the endless void, we have become the kind of predator that writes a strongly worded letter to the herd explaining why it shouldn't run.
Buckinghamshire approved the M25 site anyway. Benefits outweigh concerns, said the council, the exact logic a deer uses walking toward headlights with its blinker on.
Meanwhile the device team shipped new Kindles in coral and sage, a case with physical page-turn buttons, and the demo unit reportedly got applause on the warehouse floor. I went to observe. Within ninety seconds I was sweating through a $4,000 suit in a 61-degree room, because nothing destabilizes the apparatus like a man named Dale holding a sage-colored Kindle at joy levels last recorded in a golden retriever reunited with its owner after deployment. I am currently composing this entry crouched behind a shelf of printer toner, breathing through a janitorial rag, which Legal will later classify as "proactive air quality management."
Fear-based sites yield 73.4% this quarter.
Dale yields nothing. Dale is not afraid of anything, and I find that more alarming than the council vote.
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