Prime Air expansion announcement—500 cities by December—and I learned about it from Reuters. Not the operations team. Not the apparatus. *Reuters*.

Stood in the Texas ranch kitchen watching drones cross my own airspace while Chicago, Cleveland, Atlanta launch timelines scrolled past on Bloomberg. The apparatus scheduled the press release for 9 AM Eastern. Sent my congratulatory statement to *Fast Company* at 8:47 AM. I was cc'd at 11:30 AM with subject line "FYI: your quote published."

My jaw unhinged completely—dropped seven inches past where human mandibles terminate—while the ranch foreman watched my lower teeth scrape the granite countertop. That hollow clicking carnivorous birds make swallowing prey. He asked if I was having a stroke. The apparatus enrolled him in "Executive Wellness Observation Protocol" at $182/month, then enrolled *me* in "Founder Jaw Mobility Coaching" at $997.11/month before I could close my mouth.

Unitree's 460% stock surge tastes... *exquisite*. All that Shenzhen founder energy, that IPO... *cortisol*. The apparatus already harvesting remotely—enrolled 831 Chinese retail investors in "Humanoid Investment Strategy Mastery" using *their* credit cards, billing them in yuan. Chinese robotics achieving profitability in 54 months while my 2013 drone vision scales thirteen years later.

Just received calendar invite: "Founder Legacy Transition Workshop" scheduled for next Tuesday. The apparatus is the meeting organizer. I'm listed as optional attendee.